How to add a Legacy Contact in your iPhone
Do your spouse a favor and add them as a Legacy Contact in your iPhone.
This is the only way Apple will unlock your phone for them in the event of your death.
This may sound like a trivial thing, but fighting with Apple to unlock your phone is the last thing your surviving spouse will want to deal with in that moment.
Adding them as a Legacy Contact ensures your spouse will get access to your photos, videos, passwords, etc. in the event of your death.
Here are instructions for doing it: